I want to leave this life … You can ignore at once this message, as the next banal confession, written next naive bitch
I have too moved to hope, have too become proud. And than above I have put value of own "ego". That more strongly it has struck me at falling. I am broken and crushed. I am so weak, that I do not deserve the right on the reference to you.
I am ready to give All for anything. Or anything for All?
I would like to be significant, wanted something to cost in this fucking world. But … But I have overestimated own forces. I - the ordinaries terrestrial creature. So to say « a brick in the wall ». I hate myself.
I want to release life from my company and at the same time to release myself from it. Yes! – I’m a silly girl!! Full idiot.
But unless, it is not pleasant to trust in the full powerlessness? To submit on knees and to die Justified in own prison ideas about freedom.
As I am useless! You probably has very much bothered to read such poor complaints … If at all you will read IT
The world will lose nothing in my person. So: GOOD-BYE CRUEL WORLD,
Some people have something to give, to this world. I have nothing even to take from it.
The only thing, that I can make good, is to tell you "THANKS". Many thanks.
Your music the only thing, that in due time left me among people.
And these words - really go from soul. Soul - in which I was lost. Whether I can get out? Whether I can break a door in that reality which I wait? In this moment – is not. There was only a belief and hope on which I have no right.
Lost in her own soul…
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